The Holy of Holies

I've been studying the Tabernacle lately; what an amazing study! Beth Moore asks a question at the end of the study A Woman's Heart: God's Dwelling Place. She asks, "Could it be enough for you simply to stand in that outer court any longer?" My answer is a resounding "NO." It's not enough. It can never be enough once you have witnessed all that God wants to give. I want to be able to say that "I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord...I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in him" (Phil. 3:8-9a). Christ was the manifestation of God's glory in human form. Oh that I might be found in Him.

"Can you live with the mediocrity of life in the outer court when you have been invited to dwell in the excellence of the innermost place? If you dare enter, you will never be the same." ~Beth Moore

I don't want to be the same.

Being a Mother

Being a mother has taught me so much about God's love for me, and I'm sure as Caleb gets older that will only continue.

But, my thought today is: Is God trying to teach me about wanting to be in control through mothering? I guess if the answer was "no" I probably wouldn't be asking. :-) I realized today, as Caleb is struggling to get back into a sleeping pattern, that I want so badly to control the things in our lives. I desperately want and need him to sleep, preferably on my schedule. When he does, I can do the necessary things in life (like shower). Seriously, though, I know I have a hard time giving life totally over to God. Letting go goes against my need for instant gratification and my tendency toward impatience; if I let Him handle it, there's no telling when He will let it come to fruition. Oh, the error of my ways.

I really hate it when I learn things about myself that I don't like. But, thank you, Lord, for pointing them out so I can begin to change.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9

What We Become

I read something today that really struck me. Matt Soper said,

"Here is a good question: What do you really want? Now here is the follow-up: What are you willing to give up, what are you willing to do differently, what are you willing to do more of, and how long are you willing to work, to realize that goal? Here’s another valuable question: What kind of person will you have to become to realize that goal? That is what ultimately separates God-honoring dreams from superficial ones. Because what we become is far more important to God and significant than what we have."

Indeed. God is significantly concerned about what I become. Beth Moore said last night at Bible Study that God has two purposes concering His children, 1) redemption and 2) perfection (the process of molding us into the image of His Son). He's always changing us, and change is hard.

I like Matt's questions. There are definitely things I want in my life, changes I want to make, but what am I willing to do differently to reach that goal? I don't know. My questions always seem to be, "Do I really have to go through this? Do I really need to, God?"

And, of course, the answer is "yes." Otherwise, He wouldn't allow me to go through it. I don't like wilderness times in my life, but I know He has a purpose for allowing me to stay in them. My hope is that I will learn to recognize His leading and look to Him to make the changes in my life. And may I not expect them to be easy.

Reflecting Him

I want this blog to be a journal of sorts where I can "think" through life as a Christian. I'll post what I've read, what I'm learning, and generally what I'm thinking about.

I want nothing more in my life than to reflect my Savior.

Thought for the Day:

"God never calls us to sacrifice as an end in itself, but only through sacrifice on the way to great joy." ~Joshua Harris, Not Even a Hint (for info, click here)