"When I am afraid,
I will put my trust in You.
In God, whose word I praise;
In God I have put my trust;
I shall not be afraid."
~Psalm 56:3-4a
I will put my trust in You.
In God, whose word I praise;
In God I have put my trust;
I shall not be afraid."
~Psalm 56:3-4a
God has really been getting my attention lately! I'm involved in two Bible studies and our family is also part of a Life Group on Sunday nights where we are studying the book of Mark. Last week all three of these studies were about knowing and applying God's Word in our lives and how important being steeped in His Word is for us and our children. I love it when God coordinates my studies to send me a clear message.
This week God is teaching me about trust. My lack of it. I think I have mentioned here that it is a possibility that our family will move to Singapore in a couple of years for hubby's job. That part doesn't scare me one bit (which is definitely a testament to God's peace!). I've been to Singapore a couple of times and lived overseas before, so the thought of living in another country isn't frightening to me.
The part I'm having trouble trusting Him with is when (if) we will have another child. You see, the planner in me knows that Caleb will be about 3 when we go to Singapore, and I have always wanted to have children about 3 years apart. It does not appeal to me to have a baby overseas where my family is not. It does not appeal to me to wait until we get back, possibly having our children 5 years apart. You see where this is going. If my fears seem ridiculous, that's because they are. Who am I, and what power do I have over these things anyway? I want God's will for our lives in all areas, which means I have to give up all areas to Him. Including this.
I have to trust that God knows what is best for our family. I have to trust that He knows if we should have a child next year, the year after that, the year after that, or (*wince*) never again. When I give my life to Him, there is no area that I can hold onto and decide I will control. It just doesn't work that way. I am not God. That's a very good thing!
Today's lesson for my MotherWise class was all about trusting Him with our fears. I'm praying that I can do just that.
"My soul, wait in silence for God only,
For my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strenth, my refuge is in God.
Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us."
~Psalm 62: 5-8
7 comments:
Oh so true!! The planner in me is constantly trying to make sure everything is just perfect; that everything is planned out to the T; and that there is no room for mistakes. God is constantly reminding me to hand back the "control" of my life to Him.
It's a daily, constant struggle to go from planning the minute details of our life to sitting in the realization that my life is in God's hands and is going only according to HIS will and timing.
I'll be praying for you...
Trust is definitely one of my hardest struggles too. Not on the big stuff really, just the little details. I need to remember this post and remember that all the details belong to Him as well! Thanks for the reminder!
Oh, I'm so with you here! That whole control issue! Sigh. Another thing to work on! Good thing God is patient!
Don't you just love Motherwise? I studied it a couple of years ago with some young mom's, and although I was the mentor mor, I learned a lot.
Thanks for your thoughts on trust today...I've been tempted to cave in to doubt, and you've encouraged me!
Jenn,
All things are possible! It is so hard to give control over to the one who is in control, but when we do the doors always seem to open in the right direction. We will pray for you in this struggle.
The Becks
That's a tough one! Trust is so hard at times--but God is faithful. I pray He will walk you through this--and you be blessed as He leads you.
BTW--Aggie-Ed really enjoyed Singapore--it must be a fascinating place!
I hear you, Jenn. Why is it so easy to ask God for things yet so hard to trust Him to take care of us? I'm totally type A - I enjoy planning. If ya'll do have your second kid in Singapore, think how cool they'll feel when they answer the question of where they were born. ;)
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